N Disclaimer

N Sunday, 9 October 2011 / 11:18 pm

It has been years since i come back here to post.. Years since i start to emo again... Actually, i really dun expect myself to get emo at this age...

N Saturday, 3 October 2009 / 12:57 am

You are the sort of person that needs a peaceful environment. You seek release from stress and freedom from conflicts and disagreements, of which you seem to have had more than your fair share. But you are taking pains to control the situation by proceeding cautiously and you are right in doing so as you are a very sensitive person.

You are feeling very vulnerable at this time. Nothing seems to be going in the right direction - business wise, private-life wise, everything. You need some emotional security and an environment which could possibly provide fewer problems, but the way you are feeling you can't be bothered even to make the effort.

You have a high opinion of yourself. It is perhaps because of this self-centredness that you become exasperated when you feel that your needs are misinterpreted by those around you. When this happens - and it does quite often - you feel that there is no-one that can understand the way you feel and it is because of this egocentric self that you are quick to take offence.

It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.

You have so many ideas that you would like to revitalise but you need to realise a stable and peaceful condition to do so. Once you can free yourself from all the aggravation and tension around you, you will make strides that may amaze you. You will not be prevented from achieving all the things you so desire.

N Saturday, 26 September 2009 / 10:12 am

haha... so bored... gonna revive my blog liao... well... thx to everyone that send me their regards and concern about me... i really appreciate... will get well soon... haha...

it was quite a scary experience... i admit... haha... tryin to joke around to get my fear away... but lucky i m still alive and well... not too much serious injury...

now very sian... most likely will drop pes and gonna be clerk... well... no choice... drop den i have to accept... haha... now all i can see is Gek Ling to become my mdm liao... damn... haha...

well... another 1 more week ba... my stitches will be removed and my bike will be repaired... Yay baby... Now all i need to do is make myself recover fast! Muahahha!!!

N Thursday, 1 January 2009 / 12:32 am

Happy New Year!!! bye bye to 2008!!! 2009 arrived!!! haha...

so many thing happen in 2008... now.. looking forwards to 2009... think might look better for me ba...

Just wish to appear more in your phone... =)

N Sunday, 10 August 2008 / 10:41 am

N Monday, 16 June 2008 / 12:29 am

oh... my gd buddy... IZ... is going to his camp tdy... thats so cool sial... haiz... and me still being left behind and one more sem to go... so bored that i decide to do another round of car review on the car that i drive the past 2mth...

Hyundai Trajet


Well... this car basically is very very heavy... this can really be feel when accelerating... The CVVT engine is the same 2liter as the hyundai sonata... however, i can feel more power on accelerating on sonata rather than this car... this is due to the different weight... fuel consumption is quite bad on this car... hit around 7-8km/L. But the gd thing is that this car is very spacious. the last row of the seats still hav quite large leg room. the car is also quite stable at high speed (ard 120km/h) without the feel of getting uplift. and the price tag on this car is cheaper than other japanese MPV. Basically is quite a economic car for big family which often has family outing.

Fiat Panda

This is exactly the same color as what i have rent. the car is really small when u look at it. but actually not as small as u expected. the passenger seat may look small but it dun feel squeezy at all. The bad is really small... only can fit 2 adult. but i got 3 of my friends seat at the back seat and they dun find it too squeezy also... The car is equip with 1.2L engine. the engine is not really that powerful so it take quite some time to climb uphill. but is also not that powerless as i try to make burnout on a carpark slope. the car really give very gd fuel consumption. i hit 13km/L even thought i did a lot of unnecessary acceleration (due to the brake and accelerator pedal which is so close, i brake and accelerate together most of the time) and also revving. Bit the car is comfortable for driving but not long distance as is a little bored in the car... too simple... not much of gadget to play with. The car also has a small problem. it has a very small fuel tank (estimate 30L). But then.. overall... It is a very gd small car... No wonder James May (Top Gear Presenter) like it. recommand anyone rich to buy it as the price is $65k++.. I think is the highest price among car with the same engine size...

N Sunday, 1 June 2008 / 10:52 pm

so bored of memorizing meaningless stuff... found sth while doing my surfing cum study for exam... haha...

Five surprising reasons men are happy in a relationship
by Bonnie Yuill

Don't be fooled by the male ego. Men look for more in a relationship than an attractive women who will cook him a good meal and wash his clothes every once in a while. What he really needs is your admiration.

He needs to communicate with you
A lot of men need to be in a relationship more than women do. Surprising? Not really, when you think about it. Women usually have close relationships with their friends. They talk about health problems until they feel better. But men don't. As Helen Fielding's character, Bridget Jones, says, 'Women have emotions and men have football.' Men are competitive and so, in general, they rarely share their emotions or problems with each other, as they think it makes them look too weak. When he needs to open up and talk about his feelings, guess who he eventually shows his vulnerable side to? You!

He wants to be your hero
Knowing that he can make someone else happy makes him feel good inside, because he has the power to change things. And what bloke doesn't secretly want power of some sort? At least if he can't always be top dog at work, he can be a star at home. Instinctively, he aspires to be Spider-Man or Superman � to be your hero, to be able to make things right: to be appreciated, to be someone's knight in shining armour. So when you are disappointed or unhappy, he feels responsible. What matters is that you are happy and then he's got one less thing to worry about. Strange but true.

He strives to make you happy
The number one reason men leave relationships is because they feel as though they can't meet their partner's needs. This makes them feel inadequate, and it makes them feel as though there's no way their partner can feel respect for them. For women, communication seems to be the top priority in keeping the relationship going � but, quite honestly, men don't understand this constant need to talk about things over and over.

For men, the relationship is a success if they feel respected and if they make their partner happy. This is why a new conquest is exactly that � he feels as though he is in charge � he is once again someone's knight in shining armour.

If you resent him because you feel overworked and under-appreciated, stop doing so much � you are probably destroying your relationship! He doesn't want to feel responsible for you rushing around, worn into the carpet, and most men really don't notice whether the housework has been done or not. What they want is respect and appreciation. 'All we really want from women,' a (male) friend recently told me, 'is for you to smile at us.' (And probably one other thing, if he thought about it for longer than a millisecond.)

S*x makes him feel loved
*** has the same effect on men as romance does on women. So the reverse is also true: no *** = no love, no approval, no acknowledgement. They get that same sad, unloved feeling that you get when you don't get flowers, your partner looks at other women or ignores you.

You are his (secret) reason for living
He needs you because you inspire him to do better � he has someone to do things for, goals to reach, a reason to go out and conquer the world. What's the point of being disgustingly rich and powerful if there's no one to share it with? What he needs is the gift of you.


10 devious ways to win an argument

1. Cry
This works every time if it is not overused. Remember though, don't be too dramatic - there's no need to tear your hair, howl in anguish or throw yourself on the ground and cover yourself in ashes. On the other hand, a few meaningful tears will often soften him up enough to help him see your side of things

2. Keep on talking
Bore him into submission! This is particularly useful when justifying expensive purchases he doesn't approve of: 'I could have chosen the cheaper butcher's block (with no extra drawers or wine rack), but the deluxe version had hanging hooks, wine rack and removable dishwasher-proof chopping board. And although the super-deluxe (with fixable castors, a towel rail and two extra drawers) was very nice, I thought the deluxe, which came ready-assembled...'

3. Seduce him
Let's not discuss the mortgage/new car/where we're spending Christmas right now - I'm so horny! You'll find he's far more agreeable after a good session. God, us girls can be wicked sometimes!

4. Get his mum on your side
If he finds out that his mum agrees with you that nipple piercings on men are the best invention since sliced bread, you're far more likely to have him heading down to the piercing parlour. This can work with best friends, too, who also have a big influence over blokes, but Mummy is all-powerful and far more scary to defy!

5. Shout
For preference, do this in public. Blokes hate a scene and will often back down rather than fight it out - especially in front of friends or at expensive restaurants. But you don't want him going home and changing his mind, do you? So don't stop shouting until he gives in and surrenders utterly, categorically and pathetically to your wishes. There, that's a good boy!

6. Flatter his ego
'You're so GOOD at putting at the rubbish out/booking holidays/choosing presents for me...' Get the idea?

7. Beg
Say, 'Pleeeeease!' Be unashamedly abject. Stoop as low as you can, and then stoop lower! If something appears to mean so much to you, most men won't argue about it

8. Blame your period
You don't want him thinking you're completely useless for a week out of every month, but there are times when your period and PMT are great for getting you off the hook. Car accidents and forgetting to pass on messages are easily forgiven if committed at a certain time of the month. 'I'm sorry I slept with your best friend, but my period's about to start,' obviously won't go down so well

9. 'I did it for you!'
Claim that whatever you did wrong was done for the sole purpose of pleasing him. How were you to know he'd hate having a pink front door/a male stripagram (ooops!)/tickets to see Tom Jones?

10. Dig in those gorgeous high heels
As a last resort, try simply refusing to give any ground until you get your way. Most blokes find a forceful woman who really knows what she wants strangely attractive, and will often sit back and wonder rather than taking up the challenge against her. Very wise!

RELATIONSHIP RULES
Provided byPsychology Today

Human beings crave intimacy, need to love and be loved. Yet people have much trouble doing so.

It's clear from the many letters I get that lots of folks have no idea what a healthy relationship even looks like. So I'm using this space as an attempt to remedy the problem.

From many sources and many experts, I have culled some basic rules of relationships. This is by no means an exhaustive list. But it's a start. Print them out and pin them up on your refrigerator door.

Choose a partner wisely and well. We are attracted to people for all kinds of reasons. They remind us of someone from our past. They shower us with gifts and make us feel important. Evaluate a potential partner as you would a friend; look at their character, personality, values, their generosity of spirit, the relationship between their words and actions, their relationships with others.

Know your partner's beliefs about relationships. Different people have different and often conflicting beliefs about relationships. You don't want to fall in love with someone who expects lots of dishonesty in relationships; they'll create it where it doesn't exist.

Don't confuse sex with love. Especially in the beginning of a relationship, attraction and pleasure in sex are often mistaken for love.

Know your needs and speak up for them clearly. A relationship is not a guessing game. Many people, men as well as women, fear stating their needs and, as a result, camouflage them. The result is disappointment at not getting what they want and anger at a partner for not having met their (unstated) needs. Closeness cannot occur without honesty. Your partner is not a mind reader.

View yourselves as a team, which means you are two unique individuals bringing different perspectives and strengths. That, according to relationship expert Diane Sollee, M.S.W., director of SmartMarriages, an international effort to teach relationship skills to couples, is the value of a team-your differences.

Know how to respect and manage differences; it's the key to success in a relationship. Disagreements don't sink relationships. Name-calling does. Learn how to handle the negative feelings that are the unavoidable byproduct of the differences between two people. Stonewalling or avoiding conflicts is NOT managing them.

If you don't understand or like something your partner is doing, ask about it and why he or she is doing it. Talk and explore, don't assume.

Solve problems as they arise. Don't let resentments simmer. Most of what goes wrong in relationships can be traced to hurt feelings, leading partners to erect defenses against one another and to become strangers. Or enemies.

Learn to negotiate. Modern relationships no longer rely on roles cast by the culture. Couples create their own roles, so that virtually every act requires negotiation. It works best when good will prevails. Because people's needs are fluid and change over time, and life's demands change too, good relationships are negotiated and renegotiated all the time.

Listen, truly listen, to your partner's concerns and complaints without judgment. Much of the time, just having someone listen is all we need. It opens the door to confiding. And empathy is crucial. Look at things from your partner's perspective as well as your own.

Work hard at maintaining closeness. Closeness doesn't happen by itself. In its absence, people drift apart and are susceptible to affairs. A good relationship isn't an end goal; it's a lifelong process maintained through regular attention.

Take a long-range view. A marriage is an agreement to spend a future together. Check out your dreams with each other regularly to make sure you're both on the same path. Update your dreams regularly.

Never underestimate the power of good grooming.

S** is good. Pillow talk is better. S** is easy, intimacy is difficult. It requires honesty, openness, self-disclosure, confiding concerns, fears, sadnesses as well as hopes and dreams.

Never go to sleep angry. Try a little tenderness.

Apologize, apologize, apologize. Anyone can make a mistake. Repair attempts are crucial-highly predictive of marital happiness. They can be clumsy or funny, even sarcastic-but willingness to make up after an argument is central to every happy marriage.

Some dependency is good, but complete dependency on a partner for all one's needs is an invitation to unhappiness for both partners. We're all dependent to a degree-on friends, mentors, spouses-and men have just as many dependency needs as women.

Maintain self-respect and self-esteem. It's easier for someone to like you and to be around you when you like yourself. Research has shown that the more roles people fill, the more sources of self-esteem they have. Meaningful work-paid or volunteer-has long been one of the most important ways to exercise and fortify a sense of self.

Enrich your relationship by bringing into it new interests from outside the relationship. The more passions in life that you have and share, the richer your relationship will be. It is unrealistic to expect one person to meet all of your needs in life.

Cooperate, cooperate, cooperate. Share responsibilities. Relationships work ONLY when they are two-way streets, with much give and take.

Stay open to spontaneity.

Maintain your energy. Stay healthy.

Recognize that all relationships have their ups and downs and do not ride at a continuous high all the time. No relationship is perfect all the time. Working together through the hard times will make the relationship stronger.

Make good sense of a bad relationship by examining it as a reflection of your beliefs about yourself. Don't just run away from a bad relationship; you'll only repeat it with the next partner. Use it as a mirror to look at yourself, to understand what part of you is creating this relationship. Change yourself before you change your relationship.

Understand that love is not an absolute, not a limited commodity that you're in of or out of. Says Sollee: It's a feeling that ebbs and flows depending on how you treat each other. If you learn new ways to interact, the feelings can come flowing back, often stronger than before.

By: Hara Marano

50 most romantic things to do w/ ur bf or gf

1. Watch the sunset together.
2. Whisper to each other.
3. Cook for each other.
4. Walk in the rain.
5. Hold hands
6. Buy gifts for each other.
7. Roses.
8. Find out their favorite cologne/perfume and
wear it every time you're together.
9. Go for a long walk down the beach at
midnight.
10. Write poetry for each other.
11. Hugs are the universal medicine.
12. Say I love you, only when you mean it and
make sure they know you mean it.
13. Give random gifts of flowers/candy/poetry
etc.
14. Tell her that she's the only girl you ever
want. Don't lie!
15. Spend every second possible together.
16. Look into each other's eyes.
17. Very lightly push up her chin, look into her
eyes, tell her you love her, and kiss her lightly.
18. When in public, only flirt with each other.
19. Put love notes in their pockets when they
aren't looking.
20. Buy her a ring.
21. Sing to each other.
22. Always hold her around her hips/sides.
23. Take her to dinner and do the dinner for
twodeal.
24. Spaghetti? (Ever see Lady and the
Tramp?)
25. Hold her hand, stare into her eyes, kiss
her hand and then put it over your heart.
26. Dance together.
27. I love the way a girl looks right after she's
fallen asleep with her head in my lap.
28. Do cute things like write I love you in a
note so that they have to look in a mirror to
read it.
29. Make excuses to call them every 5
minutes
30. Even if you are really busy doing
something,
go out of your way to call and say I love you.
31. Call from your vacation spot to tell them
you were thinking about them.
32. Remember your dreams and tell her
about them.
34. Tell each other your most sacred
secrets/fears.
35. Be Prince Charming to her parents.
36. Brush her hair out of her face for her.
37. Hang out with his/her friends.
38. Go to church/pray/worship together.
39. Take her to see a romantic movie and
remember the parts she liked.
40. Learn from each other and don't make the
same mistake twice.
41. Describe the joy you feel just to be with
him/her.
42. Make sacrifices for each other.
43. Really love each other, or don't stay
together.
44. Let there never be a second during any
givenday that you aren't thinking about them,
and make sure they know it.
45. Love yourself before you love anyone
else.
46. Learn to say sweet things in foreign
languages.
47. Dedicate songs to them on the radio.
48. Fall asleep on the phone with each other.
49. Stand up for them when someone talks
trash.
50. Never forget the kiss goodnight and
alwaysremember to say, "Sweet dreams."

I regret that i nv done any of those thing to her... =(

Lesson Guy Needs To Know

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Never lose your cool to a girl, it has never helped anyting. When u
discover or hear or see something you dont like, take a step back, even in
times when anger prevents logical thinking, remind yourself, not to express
your anger. Girls never like to see an angry man, esp when its about her.

2. When u see / hear / know something you dont like, dont confront her,
confronting her about something which she didnt want to tell you, or
something which she does which you dont agree about, brings absolutely no
benefit to either party. All you would have achieved is getting your point
across that u know, or what you think is right, but it will not change how
she thinks, it will not make her think any better of you.

This is most difficult to do. However take it from a beneficial perspective:
That you've learnt something new about this person, be it good or bad, and
take time to think from a strategic perspective on how you can handle/accept
these pecularities abt the person, rather than trying to change the person.

Like the saying goes- speak softly and carry a big stick. Knowing is the
greatest benefit of all, others dont need to know, that you know.

so are u a guy or a girl or homo or bi or confused?hahaha this is
quite entertaining...a read for fun meant for the open minded or bored
working executives only.Don't u guys start frying your own brain ya!!A
cheerful heart is a choice there always...HUMP day coming!!Cheers...


I think that probably every guy have more or less been through the below
experience before :

1) Meet girl.

2) Get along well with girl.

3) Feel attracted to girl and think she is attracted to you.

4) Tell girl that you like her (after lotsa alcohol sometimes).

5) Girl disappears.

6) Call girl 999 times, but still no response.

7) Finally girl turns up and says "I only like you as a friend and sorry
if I hurt you".

Ouch! I know it's painful, trust me I just been through it but you might
take comfort knowing that this has happened to me and just about every guy
I know MANY times.

Let me try to explain what's going on here, and hopefully help you guys
and the others reading this to avoid this kind of thing as much as possible
in the future. If it helps that is.

From my perspective, there are a few main issues going on here all at
once...

1) Women are complex and often illogical or rather in my own words
contradictary (so are men, but in different ways)

Women act on emotion and intuition more than men. They don't do the
"logical" thing as often as men. Women walk into Starbucks and order a "fat
free" cafe mocha, and then get WHIPPED CREAM on top. No kidding. I see it
all the time...Women will go through a full closet of clothing trying to
choose something to wear to the supermarket, then conclude that "there's
nothing to wear in here"

Again, men have their bizarre behaviors, and I'm not trying to badmouth
women... but from my experience women are usually not very LOGICAL about
things... and they're ESPECIALLY illogical when it comes to relationships.
Men are perfectly logical (Or rather too logical). They want to have sex
with everything and everyone. Women aren't. They only want to have sex with
men who DON'T want to have sex with them. My point is that you have to put
your ideas about how things "should" be OUT OF YOUR MIND. Start a new way
of thinking about things based on reality and not logic.

2) Women are attracted to men for reasons that most men either don't
know, don't understand, or won't accept.

As I like to say, "Attraction Isn't A Choice".

We don't think about who we'd like to feel attraction for, it just
happens on it's own in most cases. But the thing to remember is that
attraction has a pattern. It's like a combination lock or a puzzle. There
is a way to create it if you know the "recipe". On the other hand, if you
DON'T know the recipe, then you're not likely to figure it out by trial and
error. And the reason for this again is because IT'S NOT LOGICAL.

While men are attracted mostly to looks, women are attracted mostly to
character. In the above situation, we displayed the personality trait that
I refer to as wussy a little too early in the game. Women generally aren't
attracted to men who get too lovey-dovey and emotional too quickly. There's
not mystery or challenge when you fall in love immediately. And when you
call like 31 times a day, it only makes the problem worse. What you need to
do in these situations is to sit back more and give her some space. Give
her room to think about you and miss you. I know it works...trust me.

3) The way that women communicate isn't always as "direct and
straightforward"; as most of us guys would like.

If a woman wants to tell you that she isn't interested in you in a
romantic way, she'll often NOT tell you as her way of telling you. In other
words, she might just disappear for awhile. Or she might not return calls
quickly. Or she might talk about other guys with you...basically, again you
have to put the concept of pure, rational logic out of your mind when it
comes to the world of attraction.

Women are subtle. They read into things and try to tell you things
indirectly. Women don't generally take what you say at face value. They
want to know what everything REALLY means.

If you meet a girl, and after the first date you say "I really like you,
you're beautiful and I have feelings for you" they think you said "I'm a
Wuss because I fall in love too quickly". On the other hand, if you say
"Good night, give me a call sometime" she'll think you said "You were kind
of boring, and if you want to talk to me again you're going to have to call
me".

There is no exact thing to say, but just think like a woman before you
say it out. At least you try to get most of the grounds covered. It helps A
LOT.

4) It's difficult to un-do one of these situations once it has reached
this point.

Unfortunately, once a woman has "made up her mind" about a guy, it's
usually VERY difficult to change that mind.

If you're in a situation like this where a woman has said "I only like
you as a friend", then you're best off going out and meeting some other
women, and getting on with your life immdediately! I did. Don't wait. Get
on with it.

If you disappear from her life, then turn up a month or two later... and
you're dating a few other attractive women... she might see you in a new
light.

Jealousy is a very powerful motivator to women, and this is often what it
takes to get a woman to see you in a new light once you've let out your
wussy self too early in the game.

Don't try to un-do it. Just get on with your life and quit obsessing over
her. Even if you can help yourself, dun let her know!

Communication - A Relationship Skill


************************************************** **
Good communication is the cornerstone of happy relationships. Learn how to talk and listen successfully

We all know good communication is at the heart of every good relationship. Whether it's been a wonderful or a rotten day, whether there's been a crisis or a triumph, sharing it in words makes you and your partner feel more understood, more appreciated, more loved. The ability to communicate well is the most important relationship skill of all.

Here are five foolproof lessons to help you both talk and listen effectively and conquer bad communication habits for good.

Lesson One: listen well
Though you probably listen to your partner a lot, do you listen effectively? Half-hearted attention, with one eye on the kids or EastEnders, is often worse than not listening at all because it comes across as if you're not interested. Instead:


Set aside ten or twenty minutes with each other every day to 'update'. If you have a busy life, it can seem like time wasted, but make sure concerns are aired and you understand each other. It really can avoid problems down the line.

When you are listening, aim to make your partner the centre of attention. Turn to him, look at him, and put other thoughts aside until he's finished speaking.

Use positive body language to acknowledge what he's saying with a nod or a smile. He'll feel appreciated and therefore more likely to listen to you.

To show you've listened, repeat back what you've heard or ask a focussed question. This shows him you understand and sympathise.

Lesson Two: know how to talk
Though you may talk to your partner a lot, do you talk effectively?
Women and men's talking styles are very different. They can glaze over if we bombard them with too much talk.


Don't ramble on, giving him a sort of 'stream of consciousness' of how you think and feel. Talk in bite-sized chunks so he can take his turn and digest what you're saying.

Keep 'checking in', noticing his body language to find out whether he's still involved in what you're saying. If he seems distracted, it may be he's just confused. So make your point again a different way.

If you're talking about something emotional or intimate that might stress him, cut out distractions, such as children or the family dog. Then move in close and touch. He'll relax and be more able to interact with you.

Don't be put off if he rushes in with a solution before you're ready. Women need to talk round a problem, and explore their feelings about it. Men feel better going straight for the action. His 'fix it' comment means he wants to help, wants to sort things out so you don't feel bad any more.

Lesson Three: train him to communicate
It's not your imagination. Men do find it harder to communicate than women do. Little girls literally have more of their brain devoted to using words. Men aren't taught basic communication skills in the same way as women are. And they're more likely to feel uncomfortable with any communication that involves strong emotion.

Show him how to listen. Show him just how loved you feel when he keeps eye contact as you talk; when he responds to what you say; when he asks you questions. Tell him particularly when his good listening gets a result, when it helps you make the right decision or feel more positive about a situation.

Show him how to talk, particularly about sensitive issues. Look out for his signals of wanting to confide - a broody silence, more hugs than usual, seeming irritable. When you spot these signs, give him space to express himself and he'll slowly learn that opening up is a positive thing to do.

Lesson Four: break your bad habits.
So often, even if you know the basics, you can get into bad communication habits with your partner. Put at least one of these tips into practice every day over the next month and you'll clean up your communication by at least 500 per cent!

If you consistently talk about yourself, he will feel pushed out. Break the habit by asking more questions.

If you use closed body language, he will feel rejected. Break the habit by deliberately uncrossing your arms and legs, and smiling more.

If you keep interrupting, he will feel unheard. Break the habit by learning his signals for 'it's your turn now' - such as slowing down, looking at you, gesturing you to speak. Then only speaking when he offers those.

If you keep answering for him when he's asked a question, he will quite rightly object. Break the habit by agreeing a signal or code word that he can use to 'nudge' you if you're starting to do this.

If you carry on communicating when you are irritated, you'll end up irritating him too. Break the habit - and avoid rows - by taking at least 20 minutes apart before carrying on the conversation.

Lesson Five: finally ... get your timing right
Sometimes, communicating will actually make things worse. If there's a crisis, a rush, or you're both tired, cranky or drunk, you don't have time to talk and if you did, it would only up the ante. So do the sensible thing and wait. Agreeing that you will touch down that evening, or tomorrow is a much better deal, because then you can communicate calmly, lovingly and with all the time in the world.

by Susan Quilliam

great... i found that me and her having prob in communication... but none of that help... cos we always talk things that both of us dun wanna hear and not say thing any of us wanna hear... =,=

How To Be A Better Couple


1. Be realistic about each other.
Don't try to turn ur partner into something he or she is not. Let's face it, guys-there's only 1 Pamela Anderson in the world, and even she has had her implants removed! Give ur gal a break and understand that her physical appearance is NOT going to change overnite with the help of a few facials or treatments. And ladies, Brad Pitt has already been taken, so u're gonna have to do with what ur guy is like! Chill out, love each other for what u are. There is more to ur partner than what meets the eye.

2. Always talk things out.
Now guys, I know this is not ur fave pastime or mode of resolving issues, but u know what? This works with the gals. Don't make assumptions about each other's feelings. Learn to xpress urself better so that ur partner undrstands what u're angry about, or hurt about, or even happy about! When u stop talking to each other from the heart, it's the beginning of the end.

3. Do stuff together.
Make an effort to do t hings together. Do some sports or involve urselves in some shared activities; something both of u enjoy or are interested in. It could be as simple as watching movies together, or jus strolling hand-in-hand down Orchard Road. Watch soccor with him once in a while though the green patch on TV puts u to sleep in 3 seconds. And guys, do give in if ur gal asks for another day at window-shopping, rather than suggest that she go out with her girlfriends for "that sort of activities" instead. If u're spending more time with ur friends rather than with ur partner, it's a warning sign that u're drifting apart!!!

4. Meet each other halfway.
If he agrees to throw out that rotten T-shirt with the "The_Rock" print, u shouldn't kick up much of a fuss if he asks u to keep ur room tidy. There's gotta be a little giving and taking in a relationship, so learn to meet each other halfway.

5.Show ur love
Buy her flowers or candy or perfume everynow and then, even if u have been together for 5years. It's wonderful to continue showing someone that u care for him or her. Cook him a special meal, paint him a Valentine's Day card. Knit him mini-socks he can't wear ( like for decoration purposes => ), buy him a packet of milk for breakfast, or pack his wardrobe for him...so he knows u can still be romantic and loving despite having been together for quite a while.

6. Respect each other.
Stop making jokes about her hair or skin, or whatever it is u love to laugh at. Ask urself if she thinks if its funny. And if he has an inferiority complex about his height, stop ogling at tall guys and make him feel worse! Love is about respecting each other's feelings and being sensitive to each other at all times.

7. Bury the past.
Stop bringing up the past. Gals..don't bring up the happy things about u and ur ex to ur guy, it would jus make him jealous or unhappy. And guys, don't talk about the happy times that u had with ur ex or mention about her in ur every other sentence as it would make ur gal feel un-happy and she might think that u saying all this b'cos u are gonna get back with ur ex or not interested in her anymore.

8. Sit on ur jealousy.
All of us go thru' spells of insecurity at the beginning of the relationship, but don't translate that insecurity into jealousy. If u're gonna go through ur partner's mail and cupboard, and eavesdropping on conversations, u know something is wrong - with u!!! Jealousy is like a poison that slowly spreads thru' the relationship before finall y killing it. Trust ur partner; love has to have trust in it.

9. Keep ur commitments to each other.
If ur partner is standing u up all the time and cancelling dates and breaking promises, u need to talk! If u're in a relationship, make ur partner ur priority and don't disappoint them if u can help it. It's really terrible when someone promises to take u to dinner, and then calls to cancel it. Don't make promises u can't keep. If ur partner starts to feel that he/she is not important enough to u, u may jus lose him/her.

10. Be honest.
Honesty is not scowling at how awful she looks first thing in the morning, or telling him that he has the biceps of a fly~! When we say "be honest", we mean expressing <>ur feelings clearly, not being bitingly cruel. When u're hurt, say so, and when u're angry, tell him/her, w/o getting hysterical. If u can't be honest with ur partner, who can u be honest with? � Love is also about honesty, and a relationship where no honesty exists probably isn't worth it!

die... i nv did any of those... i m really very lousy... =(

ah bored... hope u all enjoy this super super long post and advice for love that i found in webby...
I M SO SAD>>>

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Charlton
28/04/88
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